Stuck in the Middle with You
by MarcellusMiro66
Summary: A Crossover AU between "Dance, Dance Resolution" and "The Loudest Mission". After a clear misinterpretation of the events in the former episode, Ronnie Anne cuts all ties with Lincoln, but realizes her mistake once the truth is revealed. Unfortunately, the truth came a little too late; Lincoln is "dating" someone else. At least, that's what the girl in question thinks.
1. Chapter 1

Ronnie Anne walked down the streets of Royal Woods, her hands tucked into her pockets. She and her family were visiting Royal Woods for the time being, so she decided to take whatever time she had left now to reconnect her bond with her best friend. Of course, considering what had occurred a few months ago and the last thing said to him by her, this task seemed to prove easier said than done.

 _(~****~)_

 ** _"All right, Loud. I'm going to say this once and only once. Whatever feelings I had for you _****_– and vice versa – they're gone forever. They're dead, let go, obliterated. That day when I first met you...was quite possibly the greatest day in my life. The day when you kissed me topped that. I thought you felt the same way for me...but no. You're exactly what those four girls said: a liar, a cheater, and a big-time asshole. In fairness, I wasn't even going to ask you to this damn dance, but the arcade instead. I couldn't found you, so I decided to come here and get the hell out of here. After this...I wished I never came at all. You, of all people, quote-unquote cheating on me with not one, not two, not three, but FOUR girls behind my back. You better pray that I go easy on you for the rest of the week. Or for the rest of the year. Or for the rest of your miserable life. No matter where you run, no matter where you hide... I will make you regret the decision you made tonight. Understand?"_**

 _Ronnie Anne shoved Lincoln back into the lockers before turning tail and leaving the school as a whole. Her eyes watering up, she flicked away the tears that came up as she walked home. Halfway there, she began to comprehend the words spoken by her to her victim. **Her friend. Her crush.** Her jaw hung and her eyes widened. 'What if Lincoln's admittedly far-fetched excuse actually was the truth?' _

_A few days later, Ronnie Anne was in the mall for a meeting among the four girls Lincoln "cheated" on behind Ronnie Anne's back. Each gave their own opinions of Lincoln even after he did what he did. The one thing they all stated in common? Lincoln was a true sweetheart, didn't back out on them, and was committed to make their nights worthwhile. The four sisters admitted their part in the little plan that caused a big problem once it went awry. With each word spoken, a stab was taken at Ronnie Anne's chest...specifically her heart. It was at that moment that she knew that she made a mistake, a point only accentuated by the fact that Lincoln hadn't reacted to any teasing and bullying inflicted upon him ever since he became the school's laughingstock following the night of the dance. Without thinking, she took off towards his house on her bike when her phone rang. It was her mother. Expecting the worst, she pulled over, answered the call, and listened attentively. However, she never expected the worst possible outcome to appear out of nowhere._

 ** _"We're...moving?"_**

 _Lincoln didn't show up on the day of the move, but he (in an act of humble tactfulness) sent his best wishes to her. It broke her heart already that she was moving for her mother's sake, but her best friend/crush not saying goodbye to her personally added insult to injury. Deep down, though, she knew that she deserved this, and more importantly...he deserved to be away from her for a while._

 _(~****~)_

Ronnie Anne shook away that devastating memory from her head the moment she reached the driveway of the Loud House. Walking up the front steps of the residence, she was about to knock on the front door when a voice called out for her.

"Ronnie Anne!"

She turned around to find a familiar looking, British sounding rock 'n' roller approaching her with three others in tow.

"Tabby? What are you doing here?"

"We were going to visit Lincoln and check up on him, but then we saw you walking in front. Didn't you move?"

"Yeah, we did, but we're staying here for a few days because my uncle is considering applying for a job as a college professor."

"Wow. Talk about convenient," Polly Pain rolled forward on her roller skates.

"Certainly not _in_ convenient," Giggles _tried_ to think of a pun concerning the situation.

"What a shock," Haiku, on the other hand, didn't.

"Yeah, I know," Ronnie Anne waved them off and turned around to face the door, knocking on it immediately. "but hopefully, this is my one chance to do something about it."

Boy, how "wrong" she was. Of course, judging by the usage of quotation marks here, whether or not this particular situation can be interpreted as bad is entirely up to you. However...let's just say this is bad for now.

Lincoln _himself_ was there at the front door, no doubt about it. Yet, his signature outfit was modified to an extent. He wore a black leather jacket above an orange long-sleeve dress shirt with a red bowtie, blue jeans, and Converse® red high tops. It almost seemed as if he was going out...

 _...on a date._

"... Lincoln?"

"... Ronnie Anne."

"Uh, how have you been?"

"Uh, what are you doing here?"

"Ah, I...wanted to see how you were doing."

A look of uncertainty crossed his face before he shrugged, "Okay. Well...can you, like, move out of the way, please? I have to get somewhere."

Taken aback by her former friend's sudden shift in behavioral tone, Ronnie Anne complied. Lincoln walked towards his bike and, noticing the four girls watching from afar, waved them goodbye as he rode off.

 _"Savage..."_ Polly coughed underneath her breath.

Ronnie Anne frowned, but not out of anger. She took off after him, prompting the four to take off after her in return. A few miles later, they ended up at Royal Woods Mall. Entering inside, they scanned around and walked around for any sign of Lincoln, but to no avail. Until there was.

"Hey... Is that Lincoln?" Giggles tilted her head in confused shock, "And if so, who's that with him?"

Ronnie Anne turned to her right and gasped. She probably wished she hadn't turned at all. In the arcade...was Lincoln. _With a **girl**. _This particular girl had brown eyes, dark brown worn-down wavy hair with a side parting, a black leather jacket that eerily resembled Lincoln's, a bright yellow sundress above a pair of blue jeans, and a pair of Converse® black high tops that (again) eerily resembled Lincoln's. They were both laughing, high-fiving, and overall undergoing a good time.

And she didn't like it.

 _Not. One. Bit._

Without thinking, Ronnie Anne stormed inside and burst inside, her hands balling up into fists as she did so. The four girls followed her inside, careful to make sure their "friend" didn't do anything she would regret later on. She yelled at the couple through her gritted teeth.

 ** _"Motherfucker!"_**

Lincoln and the girl looked up from their game and gasped in horrified shock, the former in particular becoming worked up and shielding the girl from any harm that could be inflicted upon her. Whatever rage Ronnie Anne seemed to muster up quickly subsided the moment she witnessed this act of...well, whatever sort of affection he had for this girl. Noticing her saddened look of betrayal, he stepped forward and placed both hands of his on both shoulders of hers. Perhaps his act of reassurance, of course?

"We're not dating, Ronnie Anne. But it seemed obvious to me that we both met during a time when it was...least unexpected?"

"Um, I'm pretty sure that we both saw it coming, mate," Tabby called out from behind Ronnie Anne, a fact the other three girls concurred with.

Ronnie Anne frowned once again before calming down, "So...you're not dating someone else?"

"No. I wanted to tell you, but I decided to give you some more space and give you the time to work out things between you and your family. That, and I didn't know what to say to you. When I heard that you were moving, I wanted to apologize for how distant I've been since that night. I just couldn't. I'm sorry. I really am."

Ronnie Anne's eyes watered up again as she suddenly hugged him, "I'm sorry too. I'm _so_ sorry."

A hug which Lincoln returned, the four girls plus Lincoln's date swooned as they reconciled. Lincoln's date actually didn't know how to feel about all of this. Not wanting to be a moment killer (while fully knowing she had to be), she cleared her throat.

"Oh!" Lincoln turned his attention to his date, "You two haven't properly met! Ronnie Anne, meet Harley Diaz."

"S'up?" The girl called Harley stuck out a hand for Ronnie Anne to shake, which she took with stride.

"Hi. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"And the pleasure's all mine."

 _Oh, I got a bad feeling about this..._ Tabby shared a nervous glance and chuckle among the other three girls.

* * *

 ** _A/N_** _: Just a short story I just had to write based on a certain crossover drawing by **ScoBionicle99**. There may be an extra sauce thrown in for good measure, but it's gonna be M. No pressure, but rather the opposite of it._


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N** : Before I forget, I would like to "give credit where it's due"... **That Engineer** serves as a major influence on this story, in case you readers haven't noticed just yet._

 _This next chapter takes place sometime before/during/or after the events of Chapter 1, taking shots at the infamous " No Such Luck" episode (more on that episode down below in an overly completed author's note). Once upon a time, Lincoln is out in the woods __– oh, you heard this one before? Well, then you already know how it ends._

* * *

 ** _Before. . ._**

Lincoln rested his head on the floor of his tent whilst curled in his sleeping bag. It had been two months since the bad luck fiasco blew over, but the side effects were less than pleasant. Apparently, the police department didn't tolerate parental figures locking out one of their kin; this was categorized as child abandonment, a subsidiary of child abuse – a fact that neither parent were completely aware of. Of course, the last thing the poor boy needed was somebody kicking him down where it hurts and the sun don't shine. Half of the student body was either suspended or expelled due to their mistreatment of him, and their excuses ranged from revenge to spite. Adding insult to injury, there was even a **_"Ban Lincoln"_** petition...with 45 signatures and counted.

Of course, the biggest side effect was inflicted upon the victim himself. Perhaps contributing to his current state of decay, Lincoln unknowingly angered his best friend/crush into calling off their indicated relationship due to the infamous school dance held just a few months ago. In actuality, his sisters were the ones at fault at this horrible turn of events and attempted to apologize and make it up to him, but he was too heartbroken to listen or even comprehend the words that were leaving their or even his own mouth. He kept himself cooped in his room, doing nothing but his homework and/or listening to throwback songs on his iPod. He secluded himself from others as a result, the reputation he had been tirelessly building up until that point (that is, if he _had_ a reputation to begin with) was destroyed.

Then one little encounter changed all that...

A few days into June, his parents announced that they would go on a road trip as a means of compensation for their treatment of Lincoln. Of course, the last thing he needed now was a last-minute apology from them. Even so, he begrudgingly prepared his belongings for one long month of relentless torture full of sweaty pecs, bloodthirsty mosquitoes, and (perhaps the most horrifying of all) family drama.

Hopefully enough, he believed that all the turmoil would provide to himself and others.

 ** _RUSTLE!_**

Lincoln sat up in alarm and scanned around. Slowly reaching for his flashlight, he crawled out of his sleeping bag and, immediately after, his tent. Turning towards the forest, he flipped on his flashlight and ventured deep into the mysterious woods, hell-bent on investigating the noise that disturbed him from his already sleepless slumber. Seconds became minutes the more he trekked into the forest, and the temperature began to drop...in spite of the actual temperature being 90° degrees.

He came across a cliff, where he almost lose his footing and fell down to the water below. Grabbing on to a thick tree branch at the last minute, he pulled himself up and took a series of deep breaths before shaking his head. Assuming that the noise was nothing more than a stray or wild animal, he turned to leave; before he could, though, he saw something move from the corner of his eyes. Doing a full 180, his eyes widened at the sight before him.

It was a girl.

A girl in a teeny-weeny black bikini.

Lincoln had seen that type before. Leni described it as a "Chic Crossover Neck Bikini Set", previously worn by one of her friends.

 _Wait, what the heck am I talking about? I am currently being a Peeping Tom for goodness sakes!_

Lincoln carefully navigated his way down to the surface in order to get a better look at the girl. Of course, because it was _dark_ out, the journey downwards didn't do wonders for him; he had get a little closer. There was a risk of getting caught involved, but what choice did he have? ( _None_ , actually...) Stepping onto green grass instead of brown leaves or grey twigs and skipping on skipping stones, he finally got to a point where he was close enough for the girl's comfort, but his line of sight was limited to her backside. _Damn, that swimsuit's really tight..._

"So...are you gonna join me or not?"

Lincoln's blood ran cold throughout his veins the moment the girl said those words. The jig was up; she had finally realized that an intruder was invading her one-woman party. _Oh, Mom and Dad are gonna have my hide...!_

 _. . ._

 _Wait a minute... What did she say?_

"Uh... I'm sorry?"

"I figured someone was watching the moment those rocks dropped. Plus, it would be a waste of a lovely night for a quick swim. With that said...you can come out now."

 _. . ._

 _I died._

 _I died and went to Heaven._

Lincoln indeed stepped out from behind his hiding place where the bushes stood. The moment his eyes met with hers, his heart began to race. Her hair and eyes were the color brown...but different shades of it; the former was brunette, the latter...was _mocha_. Scanning her from head to toe, he realized his mistake and attempted to focus exclusively on her eyes. He just couldn't himself, though. _She's beautiful..._

"I get that a lot."

"W-What?"

"Most of the boys at the school harbored massive crushes on me, and I turned them down because...well, I wasn't particularly interested in the dating scene. That, and most of them weren't exactly my type."

 _What is happening right now? A girl is talking to me...and it's not Ronnie Anne._

"Well...what exactly is your type?"

 _... And I'm flirting with her._

"I'm looking right at it."

 _... And she's flirting with me._

Swiftly turning tail towards the lake and strutting in such a way that her backside bounced with every step, she stopped a few inches from the water and glanced over her shoulder:..

"So...are you gonna join me or what?"

...before leaping into the water with a splash. Her repeated question again went unanswered, this time for an entirely different reason. Lincoln watched in astonishment as the girl swam like it was nobody's business but hers alone. It impressed him, actually, for this girl (despite having just met her for a few minutes now) was one who exerted fearlessness and independence.

So why shouldn't he?

Stripping down to nothing but his white undies, Lincoln joined the girl under the sea – err, under the _lake_.

* * *

 ** _During. . ._**

"I don't like it."

Ethan Diaz was the eldest brother of Harley, so it made totally sense that he developed a sense of overprotectiveness as a result. What did _not_ make sense, though, was the reason behind his overprotectiveness. The moment she left for the arcade was the moment he started to worry and pace.

For one hour straight.

With his guitar held above his head.

"Like what, Ethan?"

His older sister, Georgie, was sitting on the recliner writing down in her notebook for potential fashion designs. With every passing minute, she grow concerned for him.

"Harley never goes to the arcade. Like... _ever_."

"So? I have never ever heard you say _" **ever** "_ in a sentence. Like... _ever_."

"Have you ever forgot that one time where she deemed video games a complete waste of time?"

"That was one time, Ethan! How and why do you expect me to remember that, let alone anybody else who lives in this godforsaken house?"

"Remember what?"

Ethan and Georgie glanced upstairs to find one of the younger children Daphne standing near the stairwell.

"Daphne," Georgie stood up from the recliner, hoping to put an end to this nonsense. "Do you remember the time where Harley called video games, quote, _"a complete waste of video games"_?"

"Yeah, so?"

"So..." Ethan followed suit, having regretted his decision to start an argument in the first place (but felt the need to press on). "Harley's going to the arcade today, which is a place for video games!"

"Umm, I pretty sure it's just games in general, Ethan."

"And _video_ games, Georgie! My point is that something's wrong! She _never_ likes video games!"

"Hmm..." Daphne rubbed her chin before a light bulb went on in her right mind accompanied with a sly grin, "Oh! OH-HO!"

Ethan and Georgie, their ears perking at the sound of Daphne's somewhat evil cackling, turned to face their little sister. "What is it, Daphne?"

"I don't think Harley is going to the arcade for the games, you two..."

Both teens exchanged blank stares and turned back to Daphne with a shrug. The younger sibling herself huffed and stated the obvious:

"Harley's got a boyfriend."

That time, the teenagers gasped in horrified shock, something Daphne groaned in annoyance.

* * *

 ** _Or After. . ._**

 _Some time after the archaic date ("archaic" being a switch from "arcade"), Lincoln arrived at Harley's temporary home in order to return a belonging of hers. Of course, he probably should've thought about bringing it back much sooner than much later. When he arrived at the front door, there was a note on the front door that read:_

 ** _To whom it may concern, the Diaz Family is out for dinner. We won't be back until much later._**

 _He winced with every word read, beginning to glance between the note and the door. Luckily, his decision on whether or not to break inside the house and fulfill his mission was made rather quick._

 _Lincoln picked the lock with a hairpin and paperclip (as well as the power of the Internet), granting him access inside. Closing the door behind him, he glanced around and observed his surroundings. Harley's household shared many similarities to his own, but many of them being sprinkled throughout in an entirely different fashion. Speaking of fashion, compared to his own, her residence seemed more...lively. Not that his humble abode did have its moments of kinetic energy, but theirs was kicked up to a notch that was up to eleven. Oh, never mind that. He had a mission to accomplish, and damn him if he didn't so._

 _Placing Harley's backpack on the living room recliner, Lincoln turned to leave but stopped upon his stomach grumbling. He really didn't want to quote "steal" from the fridge or pantry at a time like this, but he also really didn't want to spend the walk home in a foul mood either because of his lack of appetite. Checking the compartments in their respective order, he finally located one of many boxes of Pop-Tarts and pulled a packet out for himself. Placing both of the pastries in the toaster (an old-fashioned one, no less), he wiped his hands before an object on the counter made his heart stop before racing._

 _Laying there...was a MAC-10 with a two-stage sound suppressor._

 _Blinking in bewilderment at the sudden appearance of a firearm in a seemingly normal household, Lincoln glanced around before walking over to pick it up and examine it. His ears then perked up at the sound of a toilet flushing and (thinking quite idiotically but in the only way he could) aimed the submachine gun towards the door. A moment passed before a brown-haired, brown-eyed preteen exited the room and discovered the predicament he found himself in..._

 _. . ._

 _. . ._

 _. . ._

 ** _DING!_**

 _...and found himself out the moment that damned toaster went off. (Oh, and the gun, too.)_

 ** _PHT!_**

 ** _" AH!"_**

 ** _CRASH!_**

 ** _DING-DING!_**

 ** _DING-DING!_**

 ** _DING-DING!_**

 ** _DIIIINNNGGG!_**

 _. . ._

 _What the hell just happened?_

 _Lincoln's mouth became agape as the realization dawned upon in the most horrific manner possible._

 _He had just killed a person._

 _. . ._

 _Or, at the very least, he liked to think so._

 _(~****~)_

Lincoln woke up with a start to find himself still in his sleeping bag; he rubbed his forehead to find it drenched with sweat. A moment of silence followed, which in turn was immediately followed by a small fit or laughter. _Huh. It was just a dream. A...very intense dream._

 _. . ._

 _Why am I wet?_

* * *

 _ **A/N** : I will not lie to you. That last section, aside from being a blatant homage to **Pulp Fiction** , was all just a dream and an excuse for Lincoln to kill somebody. Those first and middle sections... Not so much. To further explain, Georgie and Ethan are protective older siblings and Daphne is written to be much more likable than her unlikable TV counterpart. (She was listed as " **The Scrappy** " under the **YMMV** page of **TV Tropes**.) Oh, and that somebody Lincoln just "murdered"? That was Aidan Peters. Sorry for anybody who was fond on him._

 _• The first section involves Lincoln going on a road trip as his parents' way of apologizing to him for the events of " No Such Luck". Residing near a campsite, Lincoln finds a girl his age ( **take a lucky guess who** ) taking a late-night swim and is offered to join her. Of course, he does...and gets away with it scot-free. At least for the time being._

 _• The second section sees Harley's eldest siblings Georgie and Ethan discussing her strange behavior lately before Daphne spills the beans on how she snatched a "boyfriend" ( **again, take a lucky guess who** ) faster than both of them combined._

 _• The third section is a bit of a doozy, so bear with me here._ _( **You ready? Here we go.** ) Lincoln goes over to Harley's house to return her forgotten backpack, only to get hungry and find a gun lying there on the counter...which he uses to "kill" a supposed intruder in the residence. The gun, not the counter. Although..._

 _I know everybody is undoubtedly sick of these " No Such Luck" AU stories by now, right? However, they do exist for a plethora of reasons, not the least of which is their way of depicting the aftermath of that hated episode in more than one manner. The most famous of which (in my opinion) is **That Engineer** 's " **What Is A Person Worth?** ", a story that serves as a realistic deconstruction of not just the many stories that have been inspired by this particular episode, but the entire series as a whole. It may not be the greatest **Loud House** story ever typed, but I think it's up there._

 _So, why am I telling you this? Well, I'm currently debating writing a story with the working title of " **Falling Down** ". Its main priority is to be quote "the " **No Such Luck** " AU story to end all " **No Such Luck** " AU stories", where Lincoln finally loses it upon the third week of being forced in the squirrel suit. For starters, he's a villain in this story. Then you have the fact that it's a deconstruction/reconstruction of the sadistic revenge fantasy (unlike " **Kill or Be Killed** ", which plays most of those clichés straight), where he begins to regret his decision to succumb to murder as a last resort. __Finally, a potential spoiler alert is where **every central character** (with the exception of Lily, Cristina, Carol, Conner, and Pop-Pop) dies in a sense of tragic irony. Yes, even Lincoln, although his is a case of suicide by cop rather than a legitimate justice murder. _

_. . ._

 _Wow, I basically just told you the **entire** story in just a few short sentences._

 _Anyway, my future projects may include elements from " No Such Luck", but they will not be direct adaptations of the dreaded episode just to spare you (the readers) the trauma of reading different versions of the same story. An example of this is my upcoming updated version of " **The Devil's Carnival** ", which sees Lincoln trapped in a post-apocalyptic wasteland blanketed with snow and riddled with monsters. This was written during my angst-driven stage, but I've learnt better...hopefully. Of course, the story and tone are very much influenced by anime, martial arts films, and Gothic horror with a sense of H.P. Lovecraft in its core; cinematic wise, the inspirations include **Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971)**, __**Mad Max (1979-present)**, **Big Trouble in Little China (1986)**, **Akira (1988)**, and **The Matrix (1999)** to name a few._

 _. . ._

 _This is the longest **A/N** I've ever written. Anyhow, sorry for venting. I just felt the need to get this off my chest. Until then, I'll see you around! **Auf Wiedersehen**!_


End file.
